KND Confessions Page
by CendrawasihError
Summary: Numbuh 2 discovered a Confessions page during his "research". Intrigued, he decided to join the train, and created the Kids Next Door Confessions page. Nothing can go wrong, right? Follow the story as hilarity, destruction, and love start to fly around. The Kids Next Door will never be the same. Ideas/Participation are welcome. Chapter 3 REUPLOADED!
1. iNTRODUCTION

**Hey guys! Been a while since I've posted any stories, but I'll assure you, I haven't lost my touch. Well, that and that I have an additional comic skill (I'm dreaming of becoming a stand-up comedian, though school's been quite tough). So, get ready for this one!**

**This story was inspired by the growing trend of "Confessions" page, where people submit anything they want to say (within the normal guidelines, of course), without having to reveal their identity. Now, I don't know how many of you guys have seen one, but it's getting really big. Heck, I have one Confessions page for my school.**

**Time for the usual disclaimer: I do not own Codename: Kids Next Door; it is created by Mr. Tom Warburton, and owned by Cartoon Network. This is not for commercial activities, just fun :)**

* * *

Numbuh 2 had no intention initially of starting it. He was only doing his usual routine, which is to do some "intel-gathering". That was his excuse, anyway, if any member of the Kids Next Door caught him with the Facebook page opened. In reality, he was really bored: it's been 2 weeks since Sector V's last mission, and Numbuh 1, who usually ordered things around, was away in family reunion in England (again). Numbuh 2 also didn't have any ongoing 2x4 projects (they've been exploding, anyway), so he thought the way to kill his time was to look at pictures of teenage girls on Facebook.

"Nigel's going to kill me if he finds out," Hoagie told himself. Currently he was on Cree Lincoln's page. Cree was Numbuh 5's older sister, a former KND operative turned rogue. She had been a formidable enemy of KND, allying with Father, but she was still a teen: like so many other female pages, her statuses were mostly about crushes, make-ups, or hottest male of the world.

"Boring," Hoagie was about to close the window (planning to build a new weapon started to become more interesting), when he saw a particular status from Cree to her friends:

OMG! Can you believe this? Someone from New Vermont High School likes Glenn!

The status was followed by a link. Curious, Numbuh 2 clicked the link. A new tab was opened, revealing a Facebook page titled "New Vermont High School Confessions".

"Confessions? I wonder what that means." Hoagie scrolled down. Soon he began to understand the purpose of the page: there were hundreds of "confessions", ranging to acts of vandalism, love, and there were couples of statuses about "YOLO", whatever that is.

As he continued reading the posts, he became more interested in the concept of the Confessions page. Sure, the posts were still boring, but the fact that there were so many people who were confessing, and responding as well. Kind of like a win-win situation: the confessor can say anything without being afraid of his/her identity being known, and the visitors of the page get entertainment.

A light bulb was turned on above Numbuh 2 (a real one). It was Hoagie's invention to inform him when an idea appeared.

"I'm going to make a KND Confessions page!" he announced. He could see it being open to every KND operatives, free for those who would like to confess, and free for other operatives to see. It would be a big hit.

Soon (after he had dinner with his family), he began coding for the Confessions website. There were lots of things that he needed to make sure; the submit form, the commenting system, the security of the website (no teens should be able to hack it), and the secrecy of it. God knows what would happen if Numbuh 2 got caught as the creator.

But he was confident of his programming skills. So, as he typed away on his computer through the night, one thought lingered in his mind.

"Nothing can go wrong."

* * *

**Well, that's the start of it. And now it's your turn: submit an idea for the Confessions page. It can be about love (typical, but keep it PG-13), YOLO-type actions, gratitude, etc. The format is simple: who is confessing, what is he confessing about, what will happen when the confession is seen. If you're not sure, don't worry; I will be posting the next chapter as an example. But anyway, just send the idea. Who knows, I may use it, and credit you for the idea.**

**And one more thing: due to my school schedule, I cannot guarantee a quick update. If anyone wants to help out, you're welcome for a group project.**

**VIVA LA COMEDY!**


	2. tROUBLE cOOKING, aND iT'S gOOD (pART 1)

**Hey guys! Thanks for all the reviews, just want to let you know that I, too, am a big fan of 86x60, and most of the canonical pairings, as you can see below. But seriously, I'm just rolling the ball here; it's you guys who keep it going. So send me more ideas, and make it a community project.**

**By the way, I intended to make one story per chapter, but somehow this one evolved into 2000+ words, so I'm splitting it into two. The next one should be on the way, though, so be patient! :D**

**Disclaimer: I do not own Kids Next Door; otherwise, I would be Mr. Warburton, wouldn't I?**

* * *

A month had passed since "KND Confessions page" was created, and it surpassed Numbuh 2's expectations. The number of confessions was just under a thousand and the visits for the site reaches a hundred thousand. In fact, the site had become so popular among the Kids Next Door that it was the third most popular topic to be discussed by operatives, according to KND News.

"Man, I can't believe that it will be this famous!" Hoagie smiled as he viewed these facts over the KND Internet. Looking at the scale of the fame of his creation, he knew that this was one of his most successful projects.

"Just a little bit longer, and this baby's going to be the best thing the Kids Next Door has ever seen!" he declared, and proceeded to check KND Confessions page.

Suddenly there was a loud knocking on Numbuh 2's room door.

"Hmm, who could that be?" he mumbled, closing his laptop. After making sure that he didn't have any Confessions-related materials, he climbed down his working desk to open the door.

Behind the door was Numbuh 1, looking very serious.

"Oh, hey, Numbuh 1! What can I help you with?"

"I need your help, Numbuh 2. I believe the Kids Next Door is in grave danger."

"Danger? What kind?"

"Tell me, Numbuh 2, have you heard about the KND Confessions page?"

"Um, yeah, I guess?" he answered, struggling to contain the urge to smirk. "What about it?"

"Well, we have sources that believe the page is simply a pretext, created by teenagers, to get intelligence from the Kids Next Door, which will then be used for blackmail," Numbuh 1 explained.

"What? Are you sure the sources are reliable, Numbuh 1?" Numbuh 2 inquired. After all, it was HIS page he was accusing of. "Besides, most of the posts there were harmless."

"Harmless? Confessing about crushes and 'I didn't follow my leader' is harmless?" Nigel retorted. "These posts might as well tell adults that we're rebellious, even to the Kids Next Door! Some of them are especially damaging to the Soopreme Leader!"

"Wait, what?" Hoagie replied, confused. He's seen these posts; they're just complements and love confessions to Numbuh 362.

This time, he let out a big grin. "You like her, don't you, Nigel?"

"Wh… I don't know what you're talking about!" he immediately denied. His cheeks, though, became redder.

"I'm serious here, Numbuh 2! Rachel can get off guard with all the posts that are directed to her! The Kids Next Door is at stake if that happens!"

"Oh, I'm not sure about that, Numbuh 1. I think it's YOUR heart that's at stake here, with all that competitions."

Nigel's face now became hotter than roses "What!...No, it's just…I'm just…"

"Nigel and Rachel, sitting in the tree," Hoagie started the song. "K-I-S-S-I-N…"

"NUMBUH 2!" Nigel grabbed his best friend's shirt collar, and pulled him closer. "Can you please focus on the problem here? I need you to help me find a solution, or else…"

"Or else what? You're gonna die from heartbreak?" a voice quipped. Nigel turned around, and saw the second-in-command of Sector V

"Numbuh 5!" Shocked, he dropped Numbuh 2, whom hit the floor, and mumbled "Ow!"

"You…you heard the conversation?"

"Well it's not difficult for Numbuh 5 to listen when you were screaming your mouth all the way to the top of the treehouse!"

Nigel regained his composure. "I can't really be calm when Numbuh 2 here," he glared at Hoagie, who was still on the ground rubbing his head, "refused to acknowledge the danger that the KND Confessions page is posing to the operatives."

"Man, for a leader, you're such a wuzz," Numbuh 5 retorted. "Why don't you just accept that you like Numbuh 362, and confess to her, instead of 'declaring' that the Confessions page is dangerous!"

"For the last time, I do not like Rachel!" Nigel replied.

"Uh hm, so I guess the fact that you're blushing harder than Numbuh 4 in front of Numbuh 3, and the fact that you've mentioned her first name, twice, is just how you show concern for the Kids Next Door?"

"Argh! Fine! If both of you refuse to accept the impending peril, then I'll just have to go and warn the Soopreme Leader herself." Nigel began to walk away, heading for the vehicle port.

"Okay, what just happened?" Hoagie inquired to Abby. "I know he's sometimes too serious about work, and I know there's something going on between Numbuh 1 and 362, but I don't think he'll be that crazy."

"Nah, I think it's because the page is way too liberal, letting kids say whatever they want. I've known Numbuh 1, and he doesn't really like things that are out of the KND's control."

"But the Confessions page is under control," Hoagie blurted out.

Numbuh 5 lifted her right eyebrow. "And how do you know that, Mr. Nerd?"

Numbuh 2 started to panic. What should he tell her?

"Uhm, I heard from Numbuh 35 that, uhm, Moonbase has been tracking the page. Yeah, that's it."

Numbuh 5 looked unconvinced. Hoagie then let out a big smile, hoping that Abby would believe him.

"Well, if the page is potentially dangerous to KND, the Moonbase must have done something," Numbuh 5 finally spoke. There was relief pouring over Numbuh 2, though now he had another problem; what if she decided to go and ask Moonbase?

* * *

**That is all for now. Your ideas have been great so far, but I'm running a one-man show, with homework and tests and assessments breaking my neck. Please help!**

**VIVA LA COMEDY!**


	3. tROUBLE cOOKING, aND iT'S gOOD (pART 2)

**This is the reloaded second part. I modified the ending because I didn't quite like it. Hopefully, this one is better than the previous**

**R.I.P. Chinua Achebe, author of ****_Things Fall Apart_****. Your novel opened my eyes to the world of literature.**

**Disclaimer: I do not own Codename: Kids Next Door; it belongs to Mr. Warburton and Cartoon Network.**

* * *

Unbeknownst to Numbuh 2, Numbuh 362 had been personally "tracking" the KND Confession page for the past few days. Unlike Numbuh 1, though, the page was a mere source of entertainment for her while she completed the mounting paperwork. In fact, only the page, and a few cups of sugar shots, that was able to keep her going.

Right now, though, she was stuck at several confessions, all directed to her:

_Am I the only one who thinks that the Soopreme Leader is cute?_

_I know I'm just a new cadet, but I really need to say this: I like Numbuh 362_

_Numbuh 362 is the best-looking girl in the entire Kids Next Door. I'm willing to be decommissioned just to get her to like me_

She smiled sheepishly, a little elated by the posts. Yes, she was the Soopreme Leader of the largest kids' organization in the world, but she was still a girl that could get easily flattered by such comments. Even Numbuh 86, notorious for being a boy-hater (Numbuh Zero knows what would happen to the Kids Next Door if she became the Soopreme Leader), admitted one time that Numbuh 4 was cute.

It was natural, therefore, that Rachel's mind begin to wonder to the boy whom she had a crush on, Nigel. She started like-liking him when she decided to resign from her Soopreme Leader position, a move which threw the KND into near-collapse after Father became the Soopreme Leader and engulfed the organization with broccolis. She recalled how Numbuh 1 kept her company, and refused to "tag" her. He even stayed by her side when she was hospitalized after sacrificing herself to eat the broccolis. For an operative well known for his focus on work, he was very caring about her.

"But I don't think he'll like me back," she told herself. "It's not like he's going to come here and march straight away into my office to tell me that he like me back."

"But, sir, you can't just come here and march straight away into Numbuh 362 office," came the voice of Numbuh 44a, who was guarding outside.

"Yeah, even if you want to tell her that you like her back," the other twin, Numbuh 44b, continued.

Their voices, though, paled in comparison with the upcoming response. "Wait, WHAT?! NO, I DON'T!"

_It's Nigel!_ Rachel shouted in her mind. Immediately she rushed to her office door, knocking some of the paper piles on her desk around the room. She opened the door, revealing a rather irate Numbuh 1 being pinned down by the 44 twins.

"Oh, hey, Numbuh 362, ma'am," Numbuh 44a greeted. "We were just telling Numbuh 1 here that you were busy."

"And that you specifically requested us not to let anyone in," Numbuh 44b continued.

"Get…off…me…," Numbuh 1 squeezed, futilely trying to free himself from the twins' grip.

_Nigel getting pinned down by the twins?_ Rachel thought. _I thought he could fight off five adults?_

"Uhm, thanks, guys," Rachel said, "But I was just having my lunch break. I think you could free Numbuh 1 for now."

"Oh, okay." The twins released their grip on Nigel, whom shot up as fast as lightning.

"Thanks, Numbuh 362, ma'am," he spoke. "My apologies if I'm barging in, but I needed to tell you something important."

"Well, do you want to talk about it while we get lunch? It's Pizza Day."

"Thank you for the offer, ma'am, but I believe this matter can only be safely discussed within four walls."

Numbuh 362 was about to let out the "don't make it a direct order, Nigel" phrase, but then an idea popped in her mind. _This is my chance!_

"I guess lunch will have to wait, then. Come inside, Numbuh 1" Rachel replied, smiling. Nigel followed her back to her office, but after he had stuck his tongue out on the twins.

"Well, Numbuh 362, as I was saying,…" Numbuh 1 heard the door being slammed, and the locks engaging. He spun around, and saw Numbuh 362 walking towards him with a sheepish grin.

"Numbuh 362, are you okay?" he inquired.

"I think we can make do without our code numbers…Nigel," Rachel replied, letting his name out in a purr. "After all, I have something important to tell you as well."

He took a step back, sweat starting to form. "Rachel, I think…I think you might have been brainwashed by the page…"

"Oh, the Confessions page? It only gave me…," she moved closer and closer, "confidence to follow my heart."

"What?" Nigel attempted to dash towards the door, hoping that he was nimble enough to evade her. Unfortunately, despite her sitting job, Rachel was still more nimble than Nigel; he was pinned down by her in an instant.

Panic started to kick in him; she was on top of him. "Rachel! You've got to listen to me! If we don't do something to the page, we'll all be brainwashed!"

Rachel's face inched closer towards Nigel's "Oh, stop making lame excuses, Nigel, or else I will have to punish you for disobeying your superior."

"Ah, no! Wait, Rachel, please, NOOOOOOO! MMPHH! MMPHH! Mmmmmmm..."

* * *

Hours later, Numbuh 5 was having a teleconference call with Numbuh 362 "So, Soopreme Leader, ma'am, you and Numbuh 1 will be carrying out surveillance and recon on the KND Confessions Page?"

"Correct, Numbuh 5. We believe that although it is benign currently, there is the risk of abuse of the page, which can undermine the authority of the Kids Next Door. Meanwhile, you will be in charge of Sector V for few weeks."

"With due respect, ma'am, shouldn't a team from the Computer Department of the Undersea Research Facility be dispatched instead? After all, we are dealing with a virtual system, not a physical one."

"You have a point, Numbuh 5. But, as I have mentioned before, this will only be a preliminary action. When circumstances required, our computer experts will act immediately."

"I guess that is logical," she spoke.

"Any more questions, Numbuh 5, before I stop the transmission?"

"Yeah, just one. Why is Numbuh 1 lying on the floor and knocked out?"

Rachel's head on the screen turned around, glancing at Nigel. His red jumpsuit and khaki pants were unkempt, and his sunglasses were nowhere to be seen. Most strange of all, though, is that his tongue was stuck out, his face looking much like a person falling in deep love. Really deep, Mariana-Trench deep love.

"Oh, him?" she pointed nonchalantly. "He slipped after he stepped on a chocolate puddle an hour ago, that's all."

"Uhm, ma'am, if that's so, shouldn't he be sent to the Moonbase Infirmary?"

"Nah, he'll be fine," Numbuh 362 shrugged. "I hope everything's clear, Numbuh 5. Numbuh 362 out."

Abby pondered for a while. There were some issues with the message that she received. First, how could Numbuh 362 decide to take personal charge of tracking the page? Didn't she have a lot of paperwork to do? Second, how could Nigel "apparently" agree to personal surveillance and recon? Normally his duty as the Sector V Leader takes precedence over this kind of stuff. Third, why did Nigel looked smitten? Maybe it had to do with Rachel. But aren't they professionals, knowing the limit as KND operatives?

Could it be that the KND Confessions Page is affecting them?

"Hey, Abby, are you eating your pizza or what?" Numbuh 3 called from outside the meeting room. "Numbuh 2 is about to eat your slices."

"Coming!" Numbuh 5 decided that the "problem" could wait. Right now, she needed to smack Numbuh 2 until he flew without his ships, a thought that caused her to blush.

* * *

**OOH! What was that!? So, I hope I hit the sweet spot, and you will to, with the Reviews button down there. Do leave comments, please, it'll be helpful.**

**Just to clarify, yes, Rachel is out of character, but remember, readers, this is romance/humor. And nothing can generate humor more than exaggerated behavior.**

**Next Chapter Hint: It will involve the liberation of feelings, a suicidal mission, and even numbers :D**

**VIVA LA COMEDY!**


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